I will try to remember~

 

I have more bad days than good days.

I long to be done with this disorder.

I long to live one day or many days without my head bobbing around

and having a hard time breathing.

I cry to give me a release of emotions because everything

gets squished together in my mind and I can't separate the feelings.

I ask god for help and for guidance and I don't think he has time for me.

Too many other things out there to be concerned with that he lets me 

suffer in silence .  

I would love to go back to 5 years ago when this all started and end it before

it began. 

Somedays I am so ready to be done with it.

I can truly understand why people take their own lives when they

live with a permeant disability or disorder or disease.

No one should ever have to go through life like this.

Please god, give me strength to endure another day, and if you can't

take me to heaven to be with my family.